"Music is a part of being human, and there is no human culture in which it is not highly developed and esteemed." ~Oliver Sacks
Healing Power of Music and Personal Narratives
Music and art can enrich the lives of people with cognitive decline. Both allow for self-expression and engagement, even after dementia has progressed. Music can be powerful. Studies have shown that music may reduce agitation and improve behavioral issues common in the disease's middle stages. During our caregiving with Kate, we discovered the healing power of music. For some reason, she fixated on the music of Willie Nelson. The songs calmed her and brought her joy and laughter. I downloaded over 50 of his songs, some for Christmas and some for year-round listening. I named the playlist "Kate's Favorites'. I played her playlist when we had a difficult day or on her Tuesday morning hair and nail salon day. She would close her eyes and sing along as I set her hair and gave her a manicure. I have read the research and watched some powerful Youtube videos on using music with caregiving. Inspirational!
Caregiving Tip
Discover your loved one's favorite music. Download the songs from whatever digital music store you use. The small charge for the songs is well worth the charge. Find a Bluetooth speaker (they are not expensive anymore). When your loved one is having a difficult time or simply enjoying some time relaxing, play your playlist and watch the magic happen! Music is powerful, not only for your loved one but for yourself as well. Find your favorite music to play as you go for a 'self-care walk' or have quiet time for yourself. I would play my favorite songs to listen to at night as I went to sleep. The songs would quiet my anxious thoughts.
Listen to Personal Storytelling
Actively listening to your loved one tell personal stories is also an inspiring art. Kate would get upset and say, "I want to go home." We tried to explain that she was home, but this would upset her even more. We then changed tactics and said, "Tell us about your home; tell us a story about it." She would reminisce about her childhood home. We heard stories about how she and her family lived without running water, electricity, and central heat. Her mother would lie across their beds to warm their feet at night. Her reminiscence would calm her and help us understand that she longed to be 'home' in the safety of her memories.
Caregiving Reflection by Henri Nouwen (2017) Healing Presence
To care means, first of all, to be present for each other. We tend to avoid painful realities or try to change or fix them. The difference between care and cure colors how we relate to people needing care and how we open ourselves to care. In the gift of presence, we settle into this moment and allow it to change us.
Journal Reflections
- In what ways have others been present to you in your vulnerable moments?
- How might understanding the meaning of presence change your caregiving?
"God, who is always present, reveal your caring touch.Give us strength to be weak enough to see your light in the dark places."